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Here are the top ten reasons for banning gay marriage.
1. God punishes those who tolerate gay marriage with terrible
earthquakes, e.g. Denmark, Canada, Massachusetts, Holland, Finland,
Norway and Sweden have all been devastated by non-stop terrible
earthquakes ever since the they allowed gays to marry. Christian
fundamentalist areas like the American south, and solidly Catholic
areas like Mexico City have always been under God's special
protection from all natural disasters because they dutifully torment
homosexuals. It works by the same principle as sacrificing an ox on
the altar or Jesus on the cross.
2. Homosexual sex is so much more fun than heterosexual sex, that if
you allow men to marry their best buddy, they would never consider
marrying a woman. Further, think of the advantages: a fishing buddy,
no fights over TV, leaving the toilet seat up all the time, no
nagging. The temptation would be too great with no arguments over
where the money should go. There would be no more white children born
and the ragheads, Hispanics and blacks would take over.
3. Now that you can't spit on niggers the way you used to, we need
some new scapegoats it is safe to take out your proxy spleen on
legally. How can I enjoy any self esteem without doctors, lawyers and
movie actors that I can claim to be superior to, no matter if I am an
alcoholic ex-janitor, national guard deserter?
4. We need to ban gay marriage because all homosexuals have AIDS and
spend their entire lives trying to give it to others. If we allowed
them to marry, they might become monogamous. That would slow down the
good work exterminating them launched by President Reagan.
5. When two men get married they just each rent a tux. What do you
think that would do to the marriage costume industry if that latest
gay trend to simplicity caught on?
6. Gay marriage causes global warming. With two men (or two women) in
the bed you have twice the farting.
7. Gay marriage causes global warming because entire wedding parties
are flying to foreign gay-friendly destinations like Victoria Canada
for a combined wedding/vacation. Think of all that jet fuel wasted!
8. If we allow gays to get married in city hall, it won't be long
before they force our congregation to witness their young muscular
sweaty bodies having naked writhing sex on our altar in pagan semen
marriage rites as depicted in the Jeff Stryker DVD Bobby Does Boston.
Disgusting!
9. Gay couples in the neighbourhood always make house prices rise. It
is unfair when two men with decorator genes or two lesbians with
mechanical competence genes start fixing up a house. It makes everyone
else look bad. They are such snobs, manicuring their lawns, creating
colour-coordinated bloom cycles and grooming their pets to perfection.
We need to take them down a peg.
10. If we allow gays to marry, we are telling our own children that if
they are gay they could choose to live normal productive lives rather
than entering the celibate clergy [editors note: and hanging out with
pedophiles], committing suicide or living a George Bush-style
depraved, promiscuous, double life where drugs and alcohol are used as
anaesthetic for the emotional pain.
[http://mindprod.com/politics/bushismsgay.html#GAY]
Here are the top ten reasons for banning gay marriage.
1. God punishes those who tolerate gay marriage with terrible
earthquakes, e.g. Denmark, Canada, Massachusetts, Holland, Finland,
Norway and Sweden have all been devastated by non-stop terrible
earthquakes ever since the they allowed gays to marry. Christian
fundamentalist areas like the American south, and solidly Catholic
areas like Mexico City have always been under God's special
protection from all natural disasters because they dutifully torment
homosexuals. It works by the same principle as sacrificing an ox on
the altar or Jesus on the cross.
2. Homosexual sex is so much more fun than heterosexual sex, that if
you allow men to marry their best buddy, they would never consider
marrying a woman. Further, think of the advantages: a fishing buddy,
no fights over TV, leaving the toilet seat up all the time, no
nagging. The temptation would be too great with no arguments over
where the money should go. There would be no more white children born
and the ragheads, Hispanics and blacks would take over.
3. Now that you can't spit on niggers the way you used to, we need
some new scapegoats it is safe to take out your proxy spleen on
legally. How can I enjoy any self esteem without doctors, lawyers and
movie actors that I can claim to be superior to, no matter if I am an
alcoholic ex-janitor, national guard deserter?
4. We need to ban gay marriage because all homosexuals have AIDS and
spend their entire lives trying to give it to others. If we allowed
them to marry, they might become monogamous. That would slow down the
good work exterminating them launched by President Reagan.
5. When two men get married they just each rent a tux. What do you
think that would do to the marriage costume industry if that latest
gay trend to simplicity caught on?
6. Gay marriage causes global warming. With two men (or two women) in
the bed you have twice the farting.
7. Gay marriage causes global warming because entire wedding parties
are flying to foreign gay-friendly destinations like Victoria Canada
for a combined wedding/vacation. Think of all that jet fuel wasted!
8. If we allow gays to get married in city hall, it won't be long
before they force our congregation to witness their young muscular
sweaty bodies having naked writhing sex on our altar in pagan semen
marriage rites as depicted in the Jeff Stryker DVD Bobby Does Boston.
Disgusting!
9. Gay couples in the neighbourhood always make house prices rise. It
is unfair when two men with decorator genes or two lesbians with
mechanical competence genes start fixing up a house. It makes everyone
else look bad. They are such snobs, manicuring their lawns, creating
colour-coordinated bloom cycles and grooming their pets to perfection.
We need to take them down a peg.
10. If we allow gays to marry, we are telling our own children that if
they are gay they could choose to live normal productive lives rather
than entering the celibate clergy [editors note: and hanging out with
pedophiles], committing suicide or living a George Bush-style
depraved, promiscuous, double life where drugs and alcohol are used as
anaesthetic for the emotional pain.
[http://mindprod.com/politics/bushismsgay.html#GAY]
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