Jippii voitin lotossa...!

Mulle taas on soiteltu Sveitsistä. Englantia puhunut henkilö suositteli ostamaan tiettyjä osakkeita. Jälkeenpäin olen miettynyt, että syynä näiden boiler room -huijereiden lonkeroihin ajautumiseen oli ilmeisesti Newsweek -tilaukseni.

jos nigeriaan lähettää postia niin tilille tulee jo seuraavana päivänä rahat mulle tuli 150 miljoonaa usan dollaria en tiedä uskallanko nostaa niitä ovat ainakin vielä tilillä

Heh, mäkin aloitin päiväni eilen saamalla kuulla että olen voittanut lotossa 1,5 milj. puntaa. Illalla sitten väsyneenä naureskelin kyhätessäni vastausta ko. huijarille. Liitän sen tähän perään =)
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Dear Mr. Mathews

I received your kind letter of my lottery win, and I must say that I
have never been happier - thus I decided to act with all possible
speed.

First I wanted to visit your office, but a some very unfortunate
mishap has led you to fail to remember to include the city in question.
So I started in my -80 Fiat Panda, determined to reach the first clue,
the street address that was indeed included in the letter. The car
broke down before I cleared the garage, but I am looking forward to
buying a slightly newer Fiat with the promised 1,5 million pounds. I
have set my eyes on a Stilo -95, in other words, brand new.

I cannot tell you how fortunate I was to locate the address, the only
possible one bearing the name in question, shouldering the Bay of St.
Louis. I must admit I am a bit jealous to see officials working in such
a nice environment. Unfortunately it turned out that none of your
company's representatives were available at that time, but I still got
to have a very nice cup of tea with one ms. Tilley, who was a permanent
resident of the "St. Louis home for the aged". Curiously, she had not
heard of your company starting at the same location, and I would like
to point out that for the aged it is very important to live a steady
life, and I emphasize strongly that you should immediately inform also
the residents of the facility of your activities. The aged might find
it rude if you did not.

After failing to find you this way, I became a bit worried. After all,
you mention the fact that I must collect my win in no less than two (2)
weeks from notification. I grew even more worried after reading on to
the point where you mention I must collect within 7 days. Immediately I
tried reaching the signer of the letter, your online coordinator, one
Mrs Agnes Wilbert.

I do regret to inform you of her passing away. She died in the late
60's, in the impressive age of 90 years.

I urge you to keep a better record of your current employees.

It is good to know that LUCKYDAY LOTTO is universally accredited lotto
service. I trust we are talking about our universe? Would you be so
kind to send me a recommendation letters from at least two (2) planets
in three (3) copies to verify. And to avoid any possibility of a
mistake, I would like to remind you Pluto is no longer considered a
planet.

I am sincerely looking forward to receiving my winnings and clearing
these misunderstandings. To start clearing them, I would like to offer
my humble services, and return to you a version of your letter with the
mis-typings and wrong hyphenations sorted out. I will hold the revised
letter in my person and give it to you as soon as you send me the valid
address again, including information of your office hours.

Please act soon, I understand the point you made about "Awardees are
advised to keep their details/information from the public", but I just
cannot hold it in me much longer. But I am sure it will work out just
fine, I have informed the local officials who will be keeping close
watch for any misuses.

Yours Sincerely

Mr. Paavo Pesusieni