Global Pension Plan for dummies:
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back right now. Here are 4 euros.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a savings account at a 5% interest for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? And I’ve got 16 euros for free. We’re both winners!
Somewhat more complicated:
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back this way: I put 4 euros into a savings account of Harry’s. You may have that savings account.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a savings account at a 5% interest for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? Harry receives 5,50 euro’s for using his name. And I’ve got 10,50 euros for free. All three of us are winners!
Somewhat even more complicated:
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back this way: I put 4 euros into a pension plan of Harry’s. You may have that pension plan.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a pension plan at a 5% yearly return for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? Harry receives 5,50 euro’s for using his name. I have met Harry througth some friends. I’m very happy that I now know him. So I will pay each of the 12 friends that have brought me into contact with Harry the amount of 20 cents. And I’ve got some 8 euros for free. All fifteen of us are winners!
By far the most complicated (the Global Pension Plan):
-Harry, I know a bank that will borrow me 200,000 euros. I can pay them back by putting 41,000 euros in a pension plan. [These bank people will have to wait another 33 years to get their money back, and for all those years waiting they don’t ask me to pay any interest at all. They are the nicest bank people I have ever met. For that reason, I keep their names secret…]
However, I need to use your name for a moment. You will get 55,000 euros, and to your 12 friend will receive 2000 euros, I promise. As for myself, I will keep the remaining 80,000 euros.
But all this money will come later, when everything is settled.
The only thing you should do at this moment, is giving 30 euros to me. We call this: “administration fee”.
Who is the winner here?
Answer: The winner, that’s me! I receive 30 euros from Harry.
The rest of the story is nonsense. You cannot find anybody who would lend you a large sum of money for a 33 year period without asking any interest. 20 euros at this moment do not equal 4 euros at this moment, even when these 4 euros will be worth 20 euros in 33 years’ time. The pension plan story is a smoke screen, used only to make it look plausible that I need someone else’s name for this scheme.
The loser is Harry. He just lost 30 euros. He may put the blame partly on his 12 friends. They persuaded hime into participating, because I promised them 2000 euros each. These friends believed in getting rich in a pyramid scheme. However, they will not get their 2000 euros for each participating “Harry” either.
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back right now. Here are 4 euros.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a savings account at a 5% interest for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? And I’ve got 16 euros for free. We’re both winners!
Somewhat more complicated:
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back this way: I put 4 euros into a savings account of Harry’s. You may have that savings account.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a savings account at a 5% interest for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? Harry receives 5,50 euro’s for using his name. And I’ve got 10,50 euros for free. All three of us are winners!
Somewhat even more complicated:
-Hi, can you lend me 20 euros?
-Sure, here they are.
-Thanks, I will pay you back this way: I put 4 euros into a pension plan of Harry’s. You may have that pension plan.
-??
-Actually, 4 euros are the same as 20 euros. When you put these 4 euros into a pension plan at a 5% yearly return for a period of 33 years, you will end up with 20 euros. So I have paid my debt to you, haven’t I? Harry receives 5,50 euro’s for using his name. I have met Harry througth some friends. I’m very happy that I now know him. So I will pay each of the 12 friends that have brought me into contact with Harry the amount of 20 cents. And I’ve got some 8 euros for free. All fifteen of us are winners!
By far the most complicated (the Global Pension Plan):
-Harry, I know a bank that will borrow me 200,000 euros. I can pay them back by putting 41,000 euros in a pension plan. [These bank people will have to wait another 33 years to get their money back, and for all those years waiting they don’t ask me to pay any interest at all. They are the nicest bank people I have ever met. For that reason, I keep their names secret…]
However, I need to use your name for a moment. You will get 55,000 euros, and to your 12 friend will receive 2000 euros, I promise. As for myself, I will keep the remaining 80,000 euros.
But all this money will come later, when everything is settled.
The only thing you should do at this moment, is giving 30 euros to me. We call this: “administration fee”.
Who is the winner here?
Answer: The winner, that’s me! I receive 30 euros from Harry.
The rest of the story is nonsense. You cannot find anybody who would lend you a large sum of money for a 33 year period without asking any interest. 20 euros at this moment do not equal 4 euros at this moment, even when these 4 euros will be worth 20 euros in 33 years’ time. The pension plan story is a smoke screen, used only to make it look plausible that I need someone else’s name for this scheme.
The loser is Harry. He just lost 30 euros. He may put the blame partly on his 12 friends. They persuaded hime into participating, because I promised them 2000 euros each. These friends believed in getting rich in a pyramid scheme. However, they will not get their 2000 euros for each participating “Harry” either.
Vastaukset 2
Vanhimmat
13th of July, 2009
Update
Dear GPP Members,
We are proud to tell you, that we have finally reached 100.000 confirmed members! This means practically, that 100.000 of those members, who have signed up with us, have also returned the documentation. Thank you for your endless efforts! And thank you for making this program successful!
We are now ready to proceed further. During the next two to three months all the memberships are checked and the documentation is handed over and processed. But to make the long story short, we are rolling! From now on the pressure is not on your shoulder anymore, but on ours.
There are about 42.000 Additional Policies still available. The insurance company prefers they are all gone as soon as possible. Get yours now for discounted price, as this offer won’t last long! Once they are gone, there won’t be another batch available. Better safe than sorry!
We are this close to the payout now! That’s exciting, isn’t it!
Sincerely,
Admin
Global Pension Plan rautalangasta väännettynä:
- Terve, Hande, stikkaatkos 20 egee lainaks?
- No mikä ettei, Masa! Tässä.
- Tänks! Taidankin maksaa heti vipin takaisin. Tossa on 4 egee.
- Mitä vittua ...?
- Ihan totta, 4 egee on sama asia kun 20 egee. Jos pistät tän 4 egee 33 vuodeksi säästötilille kasvamaan 5% korkoa, niin saat sitten sen 20 egee. Eli vippihän on sillä kuitattu, eiks niin? Mä nettosin 16 egee ihan tyhjästä. Me ollaan molemmat voittajia!
Sama jutska vähän monimutkaisemmin:
- Terve, Hande, stikkaatkos 20 egee lainaks?
- No mikä ettei, Masa! Tässä.
- Tänks! Taidankin maksaa heti vipin takaisin seuraavalla tavalla: laitan 4 egee Haran säästötilille. Sinä voit saada sen tilin nimiisi.
- Mitä vittua ...?
- Ihan totta, 4 egee on sama asia kun 20 egee. Kun pistän tän 4 egee 33 vuodeksi säästötilille kasvamaan 5% korkoa, niin saat sitten sen 20 egee. Eli vippihän on sillä kuitattu, eiks niin? Hara saa 5 ja puoli egee kun me käytettiin hänen nimeään. Mä nettosin 10 ja puoli egee ihan tyhjästä. Me ollaan kaikki kolme voittajia!
Sama vielä hieman monimutkaisemmin:
- Terve, Hande, stikkaatkos 20 egee lainaks?
- No mikä ettei, Masa! Tässä.
- Tänks! Taidankin maksaa heti vipin takaisin seuraavalla tavalla: laitan 4 egee Haran eläkevakuutustilille. Sinä voit saada sen tilin nimiisi.
- Mitä vittua ...?
- Ihan totta, 4 egee on sama asia kun 20 egee. Kun pistän tän 4 egee 33 vuodeksi eläkevakuutustilille kasvamaan 5% korkoa, niin saat sitten sen 20 egee. Eli vippihän on sillä kuitattu, eiks niin? Hara saa 5 ja puoli egee kun me käytettiin hänen nimeään. Tutustuin Haraan kavereitten kautta. Ne on hyviä kaiffareita ja on mukavaa, kun tunnen heidät. Siispä maksan heille kaikille kahdelletoista, joiden kautta tutustuin Haraan, 20 senttiä. Mä nettoan reilut 8 egee ihan tyhjästä. Me ollaan kaikki viisitoista voittajia!
Sama vitun monimutkaisena (the Global Pension Plan):
- Hara, mä tiiän pankin, joka lainaa mulle 200 000 egee. Mä voin maksaa takas stikkaamalla 41 donaa eläkevakuutukseen. Näiden pankin heppujen täytyy venaa kokonaiset 33 vuotta ennenkuin he saavat rahansa takaisin ja tuolta ajalta ne ei kuule halua korkoa ensinkään. Noin reilua pankkiväkeä saa kuule hakea! Siksipä en kerro heidän nimiään.
Kuule, mä tarttisin kuitenkin sun nimeäs tähän jutskaan joksikin aikaa. Sä saat siitä hyvästä 55 donaa ja sun 12 kaverias nettoaa 2 donaa kukin, mä lupaan! Mä itte pidän sen 80 donaa.
Nää fyffet tulee kuiteski vasta vähän ajan päästä, kun asiat on saatu reilaan.
Nyt sun pitäisi vain stikata mulle 30 egee. Se olis niinku hallinnollinen maksu.
Kukas tässä on voittaja?
Vastaus: voittaja olen tietty minä! Mähän sain Haralta 30 egee.
Loppu on pelkkää fuulaa, eihän kukaan lainaa jumalatonta rahasummaa 33 vuodeksi vaatimatta korkoa. 20 egee tällä hetkellä ei vastaa neljää egee tällä hetkellä, vaikka ne 4 egee olisi 33 vuoden päästä 20 egen arvoiset. Tämä eläkevakuutusjutska on vain peitetarina sille, että mä saisin uskottavasti käytettyä jonkun toisen nimeä tässä hässäkässä.
Luuseri on Hara, hänhän menetti juuri 30 egee. Hän voi syyttää osittain kahtatoista kaveriaan, jotka suostuttelivat hänet osallistumaan, koskapa lupasin heille pari donaa mieheen. Nämä heebot uskoivat rikastuvansa pyramidiskämmissä. Kuitenkaan he eivät saa heille lupaamiani kahta donaansa jokaista osallistuvaa "Haraa" kohti. Voi vittu, mistä näitä huiputettavia oikein sikiää...