Her research shows that where love requires closeness, desire requires separateness - an "other" to be attracted to.
Where love requires acting as a togetherness, desire requires autonomy.
Where love requires security, desire needs adventure.
Where love requires certainty, desire needs uncertainty.
So, it appears that LOVE and DESIRE have completely opposite needs.
Take any of these four pairs to their extremes and you won't be happy together.
Too much closeness and you merge together in a kind of cozy comfortable oneness. You may feel loved, but the sex won't be hot!
Too much separateness and you’ll feel like strangers. Not good either.
Balancing both LOVE and SEX's needs is what keeps sexual passion alive over the long term.
Why weren't we taught this at school???
Where love requires acting as a togetherness, desire requires autonomy.
Where love requires security, desire needs adventure.
Where love requires certainty, desire needs uncertainty.
So, it appears that LOVE and DESIRE have completely opposite needs.
Take any of these four pairs to their extremes and you won't be happy together.
Too much closeness and you merge together in a kind of cozy comfortable oneness. You may feel loved, but the sex won't be hot!
Too much separateness and you’ll feel like strangers. Not good either.
Balancing both LOVE and SEX's needs is what keeps sexual passion alive over the long term.
Why weren't we taught this at school???
Vastaukset 3
Vanhimmat
Fuk u!
miks nii? itelles.
Joo totta, etätyö viikot erossa olikin parasta suhteellemme... Tosin ei se kukoistanut silloinkaan enää rakkauden&intohimon asteella.
Tavallaan toi käy järkeen ainakin alkuhuuman jälkeen (alussa läheisyys on tarpeen luottamuksen saavuttamiseksi) kun muuten jo saattais "tasaantua". Säilyttää balanssin molemmista erillisinä, tasa-arvoisina yksilöinään joita kohtaan tuntea muutakin kuin MEitä tai VIERAITA.