This is an actual job application that 17-year-old boy submitted at McDonald’s restaurant in Florida, and they hired him because he was so honest and funny.
NAME: ----------
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company’s president or Vice president. But seriously, whatever is available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less that I’m worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS: Yes. But they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question would be “Do you have a car that runs?”.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually I’d like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
NAME: ----------
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company’s president or Vice president. But seriously, whatever is available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less that I’m worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS: Yes. But they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question would be “Do you have a car that runs?”.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually I’d like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
Vastaukset 2
Vanhimmat
Ei millään pahalla, mutta tämä oli niin crazy and sweet and funny, että minun täytyi käydä heittämässä bigmacit.
Yhden kesän mäkkärillä töissä olleena vaikea uskoa, että niikin puritaaninen firma ymmärtäisi noin hyvää huumoria.
Tavat on tietysti voineet muuttua 80-luvulta...